Call 911....... twice!!

This is the part where the movie gets exciting and I've always wondered what it would be like to say those lines.. ''call 911''.  Well I got the chance at the golf course a few weeks ago.  Some poor unfortunate fell over a stake in the ground and needed to be taken to hospital.  It was all very exciting, there was a chain of  ''call 911'' from the tee all the way to the club house.  I got my chance at the putting green, "call 911'' I shouted.  The guy next to me immediately pulled out his phone and repeated the information from me to the ambulance crew.  Me: "he's fine''... Him: ''he's fine''.... Me: ''it's NOT a heart attack" ... Him: ''It's a heart attack"... seriously how did our communication  become sooooooooo bad???  Anyway I'm happy to report that the guy had just some bruising but was otherwise fine.

Now today was a different story... I was coming out of the post office when a woman came running across the street shouting something at me about losing her pappy.... I was like ''your what"??  She repeated herself, pointed at the storm drain and ran indoors for help.  Well I thought it was probably some gadget she dropped, probably her phone according to the distress she was in.

Well I thought I better show some interest and walked calmly over to the storm drain... and there he was, a very cute little PUPPY.  I know, a puppy!!!!!!  How the hell do you manage to loose your puppy into a storm drain??  It was probably about a 4ft drop and the poor little fellow was crying but you could see that he was totally fine.  Still, I felt I couldn't leave him and waited for the owner to return (she had disappeared).  Finally she arrived back, she had already called 911.   I was trying so hard not to laugh (seriously the puppy was fine Sandra!!) she was in total panic and she was constantly saying ''oh fu*k" followed swiftly by an apology for such terrible language.  Anyway it turns out that Animal Rescue were on the way.  I hung around for another few minutes while the woman became a little calmer.  Then she told me that she only got the puppy the night before against her husbands wishes.  He really didn't want a puppy but when he saw him he fell in love and now the poor thing was in the drain.  I told her I wouldn't tell him anything until the puppy was safely in her arms again.  She replied ''that's very smart'' and then went ahead and phoned her husband.  The conversation didn't last long............. he was on the way.............. I legged it!!!!!